Friday, August 29, 2014

Inspired Writers Retreat

What more beautiful setting than Park City, Utah?
What better gift to receive than the words of Authors who are genuinely writing to make a change in the world and BE their TRUTH?

Bridget Cook Burch, New York Times Best Selling Author creates workshops to serve aspiring authors.
I was honored to be asked to take photos of the weekend, be involved in the process, and take pics of MY PASSION and MY MESSAGE... which is, "WHO ARE YOU? What is YOUR MESSAGE?"

These are some of the answers.

Thursday, August 28, 2014

The First Kiss

Journal Entry:

The First Kiss

We met as the sun was growing lazy. It wasn't "Sunset" yet- but all the world was becoming more golden and the heat of the day was relaxing.

He had come from a long day at work and used a wash cloth to cool his neck and face and hands.
We talked and laughed and shared stories and music in the front seat of the car; windows down- cool breeze occasionally swirling through the cab.
As the sun began fading and the first star or two dared to venture the evening sky- melancholy took over me and I knew the blissful lapse from the march of "real Life" was coming to an end- we sat in my car cab and replaced our kicked off shoes and our conversation became wistful and longing as we each wished we could stay a while longer.

The song played; "On a Night Like This I Could Fall in Love" and the melody caressed our final moments. "Dance with me?" I asked knowing it was time to say goodbye and also remembering our casual joking from a time long ago about dancing under starlight.

                                                                     image credit

So, we stood close to the car, night time settling in and he wrapped his arms around me while my own arms clung around his neck.
The music was low and curled over us like ribbons.
My heart was pounding as we moved to the music and it felt like a dream.
His cheek was rough and unshaven next to mine and as he breathed I could feel the heat of his breath flow down my neck and pool at my collar.
The music continued wafting over us and my whole body began to shiver. The desire to taste him; to feel his mouth pressed against mine and the "Rule Book of Right and Wrong" battled inside me; the tearing of conflicting emotions pulsated through every vein as I fought to leave and simultaneously fought to stay.

Just feeling his face so near- his mouth so close, his breath on my ear... the next thing I remember is the kiss.

My lips reached for his like a hand that always finds it's place in the palm of it's lover's.
image credit

My mouth- his mouth crushed against each others, gently, urgently, graciously, hungrily and I finally got to taste this man.
Gasping for air we kissed and kissed and kissed and I held him as if he were all that kept me from being swept away in the flood of emotion.
I never understood the adage of  "TIME STANDING STILL" - but it did and as soon as he touched me- I knew I knew him. I knew his kiss, his mouth- even his body.

Image credit asthesunrisesoverthemountains: all-things-bright-and-beyootiful: Melissa Green Photograph

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

The Light and and Liars

At different times I am sitting in a crowd listening to speakers.

When people mean what they say they GLOW.
It's beautiful.
I don't always agree with them, but see that they absolutely mean and believe what they say is truth and it is their LOVE that begins to radiate around them. They stand as a light house on a foggy morning.

image credit

When people stand and are filled with passion, speaking to a crowd and are inciting them to join in a cause of anger and hate... they don't glow, but the darkness around them is like an octopus whose poisoned tendrils extend out over the crowd and begin wrapping and winding around them until the anger is choking infuriating.

MOST of the TIME.... there is nothing.
Most of the time.... I see people speaking who want to appear to believe what they say, appear to have passion and truth... but they are repeating OLD words that sounded good and want to sound good to others.

It is our HEART or our HATE that changes the world. 

I will not echo down the message of those who have stood high upon the mountain.

I WILL CLIMB and as I climb I will tell you what I am learning; what I see from where I stand- and as I climb I know with every step I RISE and my perspective changes- my view expands and my heart is opened. 


Tuesday, August 26, 2014

The Day My Husband Left Me

My husband and I moved into different levels of our house 6 months before he left.
I lived on the 3rd floor, he lived in the basement.
He left to Nebraska.

Here are some excerpts from the 5 page journal entry:

Journal Entry May 2011

"I've been asking myself why I let myself be powerless and feel powerless in my life and why I let myself diminish myself and allow FEAR to dictate whether or not I could say and know 'I am beautiful. I am amazing. I am worthy...'

"I get that I was searching. Searching for a place to belong because I never 'BELONGED' to myself but to the opinions of those around me and that they swayed me and my course in life like SAILS shifting with every wind.

What I know now is that the winds are only there to serve me and not to sway me. Regardless of the direction of the wind and the force of them these are MY SAILS and I choose where I go.

Even though I've spent times going in circles and being maneuvered by the whims of OTHERS- I am learning how to shift MY sails. I also see that when there isn't blustery days- it's okay to weigh anchor and revel in the peace of a smooth and symphonic ocean as it cradles and rocks my soul.

I am blessed. I am at peace."

(images found on pinterest, no image credit could be located) 

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

The I AM Message

We came here to shift the world. 

We sat amongst the stars and watched humanity suffering but also saw threads of hope, love, truth and compassion. 

Image Credit

Every one of us chose to join the movement of LIFE here on Earth.
We weren't as concerned with our singular selves as we were with the WHOLE.

We saw our Family, those already living on this planet and said "I'll go. I'll go for us all."

We chose our body, our family, our parents, our challenges, our path. We chose- not knowing the thickness of the veil, not capable of understanding the darkness and heaviness of the THIRD dimension.... how could we? We ONLY knew LOVE and LIGHT.

We chose the lines we would walk because we knew if we SHIFTED and TRANSMUTED the DARK to LIGHT... then we BREAK THE CHAINS of Ancestry and Posterity and loosed the SHACKLES that bound family lines... THEREFORE.... generation by generation, we shift the ENTIRE world to LIGHT.

Here on the Earth Side of the Coin FLIP... we became distracted. Distracted by getting the house, the car, finding another to love us... (we forget WE are LOVE and SELF SUSTAINING) and the pain and the illnesses, etc etc etc.... and we forget the INTENTION we had to SHIFT dark to LIGHT.

BUT............ When we CLAIM who we are..... When we make the INSTANTANEOUS CHOICE to say  "THIS IS WHO I AM!!!!!!!" and then LIVE by THAT CODE...... 

We take the step towards changing the world for the better.

Monday, August 11, 2014


I facilitate DRUM CIRCLES.....

I never know what will occur at the circles. So, I'm here today sharing an experience from last night.

Last night was August 10th, FULL MOON SUPER MOON. The second of THREE Super Moons that will occur this year and a rare cosmic event.

The MOON is closer to the Earth at this time and just like She pulls upon the Oceans of the world, She pulls on the blood in our veins and causes our physical and emotional bodies to rise. The Earth/Dirt itself raises up 1-2 inches every full moon. There is immense pressure and refining... in a sense all the "stuff" we tend to avoid and ignore raises to the surface of our consciousness in order to be transformed and transmuted and shifted with the support of our Heavens. The DRUM CIRCLES teach how to shift the energy and release it; shifting the dark to light and throwing all discord to the skies and stars. RELEASE.

So, the MAGIC of last night.
During the Circles, there is a process where someone from the group steps forward (volunteers) and the rest of our group has the opportunity to support, love and serve unconditionally whomever has the courage to CENTER our unique group.

Yesterday, a woman stepped forward.

I could sense her severe emotions and turbulence.
I asked her what she was here to RECEIVE and after she answered I asked her what she was there to RELEASE.
When our hands are full of holding on ... they are not open to receive the gifts of our angels.

She asked for Forgiveness.
I asked her "For who?"
She answered "For myself."
I asked what she would release
She said "Guilt."

I vaguely remember what happened next.  I keep a quote in front of my computer.... I'm looking at it now... it says
"Forgiveness is ours. Always. God never withholds forgiveness. God is not a God of Grudges. The process we sometimes take to 'be forgiven' isn't about God rejecting, but about us OPENING to RECEIVE what is free-flowing. It is done."
(oh the quotes mine... lol)

I said something to her along those lines... there was immense clarity as I spoke to her, words flowing from my heart. Our group circled around her and drummed and then, she and I embraced. I said something as we held each other (that I don't remember now) and she wept.

(image credit

After the experience, we continued to finish the evening; which included a session of Tibetan Bowl Singing by the talented Bill Cael. (find him here)

When our night was finished, the woman I am speaking about sought me out in the hallway and asked "I am wondering if you will paint my drum someday?" and of course I said yes (ummm, if you didn't know- now you know I'm an artist and routinely paint commissions)

she said "You painted my mom's drum."
Naturally I asked "Who is your mom?"
When she told me, tears came to my eyes and I reached out holding her to my heart.
Her mom passed away unexpectedly in March.
My dear friend.
We held a drum circle in her honor but her daughter (the one I now held) didn't attend.

I now understood why the words I spoke I spoke, whatever I said. I now knew that the messages given weren't from me and I was honored to be proxy.

I love you dear friend. I miss you. Thank you. May you always fly free.